Slacker

Wow!!!  I am THE worse blogger of all times.  It has been over 2 years since my last blog post.  I'm such a slacker.  Maybe this whole blogging thing isn't really for me - Or is it?

I can't take credit for this piece - I got it off the web.  But I love it.  Pretty much sums it all up.

I'm the type of person that thinks out loud.  If you know me or have seen me, I'm the one wandering around babbling to myself or anyone who will listen.  I look mentally unstable and sound worse.  I'm fine.  I'm "normal".  I just have to hear my words as they are coming out of my mouth so that I can put them into perspective.  THIS type of sorting is what gets me into trouble.  Because I have to hear them to sort them, I say them in public and people think I'm crazy, angry, mean, judgmental, questionable in character...you fill in the blank.  I'm not as much as you may think though.  It's not so much my convictions and character that is really coming out but the immediate thought that is cluttering my mind and keeping me from what is really my true thought.  I blurt it out, kind of like tossing a ball out to see where it will go and if someone is around to hear it, it could be misunderstood.  Like tossing a ball out, it could hit someone and hurt them if it is not a calculated toss, which would bring yet another thought into the picture in the scope of all of this and this is what I am trying to avoid.

Call me eccentric, call me bi-polar, scatter brained; call me what you wish, but it is how I have been trying to organize my brain for years and it's only getting worse with age and pre-menapause.  I'm starting to become one of those...ahem... "more mature" women who just speaks her mind and doesn't think anything of it.  Kind of like wetting yourself in public and acting like there's nothing wrong with it.  It is a sight for everyone else to behold and gawk at causing uneasy feelings but for me, it is like any other day.

So, back to my original thought of if I should or should not blog.....

Because I have to toss those thoughts out to help organize them, blogging is kind of the back board.  I can toss the thought against it and see what comes back and edit things before I just post the latest and greatest headlines of my over working brain.

It is kind of like keeping a journal but allowing others to read it and by some chance help or encourage.  That statement just makes me laugh.  I can't tell you why, it's too random what is going on in my head right now.

If someone were able to take a journey into my mind, it would out weigh all the amusement parks in the world including all the Disney parks.  There's just so much going on in there you would need to plan your trip out.  I used to think I was below average mentally and academically but now, I think other wise.  I just don't think like everyone else and it seems the only other person who gets me besides me is my sister.  I think it's because she too suffers from the same genetic malfunction because I don't see this anywhere else in my family.  Oh, wait, now that I think of it, my cousin on my mother's side of the family is the same way.  It must be the Norwegian blood.  Damn Vikings!!!!

Most of my life has been structured because others have always told me what to do and how to do it and how to act and how to talk.  "This is acceptable, what you are doing, is not"  "You can't just say THAT, this is the acceptable way of saying it"  "You can't just walk around being YOU, it is not acceptable."

So, now that I am almost 42 years old and I am starting to understand more of why I need to hear from God and listen to what HE says, I'm starting to find out that I am exactly the way HE wants me to be, despite what everyone else around me is telling me.  I am not perfect, fine tuned, well rounded, but I am where He intends me to be now.  Tomorrow I will be right where He intends me to be then and in 475 days from now, I will be right where He intends me to be then.

We have all been created in the image of God.  We have all been created peculiarly.  The word peculiar is in the Bible 7 times.  One for each day of the week, I say.  *Each time that word is used, it is used to describe God's people and His treasure.  We are HIS treasure.  So, in all of my idiosyncrasies and random thoughts that become verbalized, I can remember that no matter what I say and who I offend (I apologize), I am still God's peculiar treasure that He hand chose for such a time as this in 2012 to live as His voice box and He has a plan for me and I apologize ahead of time for anyone who gets in the way of that.

* Verses:
Exodus 19:5 - peculiar treasure= valued property
Deuteronomy 14:2 - peculiar people = valued property
Deuteronomy 26:18 - peculiar people = valued property
Psalm 135:4 - peculiar treasure = valued property
Ecclesiastes 2:8 - peculiar treasure = valued property
Titus 2:14 - peculiar people = a people selected by God from the other nations for his own possession
IPeter 2:9 - peculiar people = coming   into, unto, to, towards, for, among  the    possession, one's own property (in other words, we are among God's most prized possessions)